May 8th, 2002


all my wildest dreams came true....

so i am sitting at 2pm. havent had a shower yet. smoked too many cigs already...and i had my coffee. life is lovely. haha. I need to take a shower though I stink! Anyways...Justin and I got in an argument last night b/c I was being stupid. I just need a lot of attention...he knows this...knew it when he married me. I dont crave attention from anyone but him. I'm so weird. He just works too much and when he is not working he just wants to lay around, b/c hes tired. I dont work at all so i constantly want to do things w/him when he is off. This situation doesnt work too well. haha. The military has to be his #1 priority..b/c he doesnt have a choice. He says I'm his first priority and I know I am to him...but the military life kind of over rules that. Its hard to explain...unless you are actually a wife of someone in the military..then you will know what I am talking about. Sometimes I wish he didn't even join...but then I think about it and I cant think of it any other way. They take care of me, which they dont have to, so I am grateful for that. Thats one of the good things about the AF..they take care of their families. Anyways..I can't wait until they go back to 8hr. shifts b/c our lives will be so different. (like it was before) This 12hr shit is the worst. So anyways..we got everything worked out after we had a nice conversation. I just feel like I never get to talk to him during his work now at dinner we are keeping the tv off until we talk about everything we want to talk about w/eachother...and it wont get turned on until we are done. He feels bad about working all the time..he says thats why he is constantly trying to buy me make up for him being gone so much. I now have 8 cherished teddies..i bought one on ebay the other day..for only 10 dollars (w/shipping and everything) its a football one I got for Justin. It says on the bottom "Will you be my football hero?" Its so cute..I showed him the picture and he loved it as well. :) I need a job so I can buy him things all the time...b/c I love buying him things. I remember when we were dating all the crap I bought him just b/c I could. I wish he wouldnt feel bad about working all the time, b/c its not like he has a choice yah know? I will love him all the same no matter what. He's my baby. hehe. Well thats enough for now b/c I could go on and on about how much i love him...and you would all be bored. :)
  • Current Music
    the nearness of you -Norah Jones

survey. yay!!!

1) What is your idea of perfect happiness? god. being me. a loving husband. beautiful children. family. friends. all you need is love :P

2) What is the trait you most deplore in yourself? jealousy. trusting people. my social skills.

3) What is your favorite journey? the one I am having right now. :)

4) What living person(s) do you most despise? my father.

5) What or who is the greatest love of your life? justin.

6) When and where were you happiest? Sept. 15, 2000

7) Which historical figure do you most identify with? this is a hard one. hmm. probably the past military wives..expecially the ones involved in wars where their husbands left for long periods of time.

8) What do you dislike most about your appearance? my weight.

9) What is the trait you most deplore in others? ignorance.

10) What do you consider your greatest achievement? being happy.

11) Where would you like to live? japan.

12) What do you most value in your friends? honesty. loyalty. complete trust. they are always there for me.

13) What are your favorite names? i have a whole list: girls: Emma, Avery, Ava, Audrey, Makenna, Kaylee (kayleigh), Kaylin (kaelyn), Raelyn, Riley, Mabel, Isabelle, Brooke, Josephine (joey), Grace. boys: Keegan, Kale, Tyler, Hayden, Jayden, Kaleb, Brendan, Zyon, Landon, Ethan, Evan, Jacob.

14) Who are your favorite writers? sylvia plath. judy bloome. shirley jackson. ernest hemmingway. jewel. amiee. me. steven king. i read about everything expecially those "oprah book club ones" i love "shes come undone" by wally lamb.

15) Who are your favorite heroes of fiction? esther in the bell jar.

16) Who are your heroes in real life? my mom.

17) How would you like to die? peacefully.

18) What is your greatest fear? being murdered...or cant have a baby.

19) If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be and why? another girl..b/c i like it this way.

20) What amazes you the most? my life.

21) What is your greatest regret? hmm. i really cant have regrets b/c i wouldnt be who i am now...and i love who i am now most of the time. hehe. :) stupid answer? yes i know, but it tis the truth.

2) If you could be granted one wish, what would it be? money money money...and of course, peace on earth. haha. :P
  • Current Music
    seven years -norah jones.